New Girl

Ensuring that we will never, ever stop referring to her as “adorkable,” Zooey Deschanel recently told The Huffington Post that she is not, in fact, adorkable. Classic Zooey! So adorkable. She says that she doesn’t always agree with how she’s “portrayed in certain public contexts,” so she tries to stay away “from that sort of thing.” She also claims that “adorkable” was created by Fox’s marketing department to promote the first season of New Girl, and not, as we assumed, plucked from a unicorn’s eyelash upon the day of her birth. Attempting to put the adorkable nail in the adorkable coffin, Deschanel says, “[adorkable is] a word that describes the character that I play, not me. I don’t personally have identification with that word myself.”

Apparently, Zooey Deschanel is a real person who can’t have her entire persona described with one (perfect) word. Like any real person, she sometimes has thoughts and feelings that are definitely not adorkable—such as when she’s asking Siri if it’s raining, or when she’s playing Christmas songs with her cutesy indie band. Plus, that new Death Cab For Cutie song is probably about her, and how does its chorus go? “How could something so adorkable be so cruel.” She must be pretty vicious to have hurt a sensitive boy like Ben Gibbard, right?

So what is Zooey Deschanel supposed to do now? She claims that she’s not adorkable, and yet everything she does seems adorkable to us. Is it possible that we don’t actually know Zooey Deschanel all that well, and we’re just judging her based on the roles she chooses and music she plays? If someone says and does adorkable things, does it really make them adorkable? We’re gonna go with “yes.”