We’re apparently a bit late on reporting this, but TMZ—which is becoming an alarmingly accurate source for newsgathering these days, in the same topsy-turvy world where the National Enquirer actually considered applying for a Pulitzer—has been diligently following an alleged murder plot against actor Jon Cryer by his ex-wife, one so serious that the FBI is now involved. Cryer and his ex, the (unfortunately named, considering) Sarah Trigger, have been going at it in a nasty custody battle for a while now, and last week’s taping of Two And A Half Sitcom Contrivances Per Episode was reportedly disrupted (pause for sarcastic expression of disappointment) when a “significant threat” was made to Cryer’s safety, forcing the show to tape without its studio audience. Fortunately, it was one of the more dramatic episodes of the series, concerning the tragic and sudden death of Col. Blake over the Sea of Japan. But still, disruptive.

This week more details emerged, as it was revealed that Cryer reportedly contacted authorities and told them that he believed his life was in danger, and that his ex-wife had hired a hitman to take him out. The FBI is currently investigating, but as always the real digging falls to those tireless muckrakers at TMZ, who recently ambushed Cryer’s ex in a parking lot and asked—politely and everything!—whether she had any comment about how she totally tried to kill him. Somewhat surprisingly, no, she didn’t. Meanwhile, between this and Charlie Sheen’s War Of The Roses love story, the behind-the-scenes drama of Two And A Half Men is becoming way more interesting than the stuff that ends up on screen.