Earlier this week, Andy Dick whipped out his genitals in public again, this time at a Los Angeles coffee house—an autumnal follow-up to his summertime Fourth of July flashing incident at a Venice-area house party he had crashed, suggesting that Andy Dick is on some sort of seasonal roundelay of taking his dick out, which makes one wonder what he has in store for winter. (Perhaps something involving a tiny wool cap?) This happened on Monday at L.A.'s Cafe Audrey, where Dick reportedly brought a 12-pack of Budweiser with him, “started spilling beer all over himself,” said, “I have to take a piss,” pulled out his penis, and then yelled "I'm right here!" at a passing tour bus.
Anyway, this is not news. By now, stories of Andy Dick behaving inappropriately occur with such bludgeoning regularity that we’ve all grown numb to them, like hearing daily reports of bombings in Baghdad. We’re aware that they’re happening, that they’re wrong, and that someone should do something about them, but our powerlessness to stop them only makes us tired and apathetic. But here’s a picture of Andy Dick with Andy’s dick blurred out all the same.
Unfortunately, Andy Dick also has a 22-year-old son, struggling stand-up comedian Lucas Dick, and when his son isn’t incorporating Dick’s antics into his act, he’s also giving eminently sad interviews about them to blogs like RumorFix.com. Asked to comment on his dad’s most recent incident of public exposure, Lucas Dick said, “He’s so hilarious,” but added, “I don't really know what happened really. I try to avoid it. I don't want to know that shit. Think about it, would you want to know that stuff about your dad?" That’s pretty sad. “I usually wait until he gets sober, then he'll call me,” he continues. “I don't like to hang out with him when he drinks too much." Yep, that’s even sadder. Please stop asking Andy Dick’s son to talk about Andy Dick, please, especially as he seems convinced that his dad is doing just fine and is also hilarious. You’re making us sad. Also sad: Andy Dick is old enough to have a 22-year-old son. When did that happen? Is he able to reproduce by spore or something? Is that what all the groping people in bars is about?