Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

There will be an Entourage movie, as prophesied in the long ago

Illustration for article titled There will be an emEntourage/em movie, as prophesied in the long ago

Vincent Chase’s circumnavigation of the Hollywood world is nearly complete, as this eighth and final season of Entourage sees him returning home—like a modern Odysseus having escaped from Sasha Grey’s coke-pushing Circe, survived his shipwreck on the rocks of whatever that shitty-looking Ferrari biopic was, and at last reclaimed his rightful throne, where he can finally see some tits again and make a dog movie. But as foretold in 2009, his journey shall not end there—nay, producers Doug Ellin and Mark Wahlberg have sworn, before gods and man and reporters at the show’s Television Critics Association panel, that Entourage boldly will go on as a feature-length film, even if Wahlberg himself has to take metaphorical hammer and chisel in hand and pay for it himself. “We’re going to do a movie,” Ellin avowed in a voice we can only assume resounded like a thunderclap. As quoted by Deadline, Ellin continued, “We’re going to do it. The questing is when and how quickly. Hopefully we’ll come down with an idea and make it happen.”


Naturally, some will assume that this is just a typo, and Ellin actually said “question” instead of “questing,” or that he meant “come up with” instead of “come down with.” These people are plebeian fools. Ellin and Wahlberg are clearly referring to their quest to scale Mount Olympus and petition the Muses for a premise suitably epic to sustain 90 minutes, like maybe Vince gets a movie job that requires him to go to a tropical island for a while, and then they all go and they have fun together just being friendly bros. And then maybe some celebrities drop by and play asshole versions of themselves, and in a subplot, Jeremy Piven yells. Unfortunately, we are not the immortal singers of song; to them, we are as the croaking of frogs. But whatever idea Ellin and Wahlberg eventually “come down with,” know this: Though for a while it looked as if there may not be an Entourage movie, with things very nearly going completely wrong, it seems as though, at the last possible minute, everything will work out just fine. Let heaven and earth meet in the ritual clinking of imported beer bottles.

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