In the unlikeliest juxtaposition of hip hop and religion since Shaggy 2 Dope was named Arch-Bishop of Detroit, The Vatican has demarcated "Changes" as one of its favorite joints. 2Pac's posthumous Bruce Hornsby-sampling opus is the only the second American song represented in a list compiled by Father Giulio Neroni, who clearly sided with Pac, Death Row Records and the humorously named Marion "Suge" Knight in the notorious, media-fueled East Coast-West Coast rivalry of the mid-90s.
O.K, which of the below is most surprising?
1. That the Vatican endorsed the music of a pot-smoking, alcoholic, ex-con gangsta rapper who served time for sexual abuse
2. That the most feared man in hip hop is named or nicknamed both "Suge" and "Marion"
3. That both 2Pac and E-40 sampled Bruce Hornsby's "The Way It Is"
4. That the Vatican has a Myspace playlist
This isn't the first time the Vatican has taken a public stand on the value of various rappers. Oh, and if the headline for that story isn't up to The Onion's usual high standards, it's probably because it's one of three headlines I wrote that made it into the paper.
Shockingly, "Changes" isn't the most controversial song on the list; that honor belongs to Maurice Chevalier's poorly received follow-up to his signature song, "Thank Heaven For Little Boys". No word yet on whether 2Pac's "Hit Em Up" (sample lyric: "I fucked your bitch you fat motherfucker) will join "Changes" on the Pope-approved playlist next year yet we remain, as always, cautiously optimistic.