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Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

That Rush Hour TV series will be on CBS

Illustration for article titled That Rush Hour TV series will be on CBS

CBS has given a pilot commitment to the TV adaptation of Rush Hour, the Jackie Chan/Chris Tucker action franchise. As previously reported, Cougar Town’s Bill Lawrence and Blake McCormick will team with Rush Hour director Brett Ratner to bring the series to the small screen. Lawrence probably won’t be teaming up with Chan and Tucker, however, because they are movie stars and this is CBS. So the producers will need to launch an extensive search to cast the actors who will be inhabiting the TV versions of the rich, nuanced characters that Chan and Tucker fleshed out over three films’ worth of yelling and hitting people: a black guy and an Asian guy who don’t like each other, and then they do, and then the show is over.

Of course, it’s also possible Lawrence and company could push the premise further, with each episode introducing another incongruous pairing of law enforcement officials to act as foils for Black Cop and Asian Cop. Maybe we’ll see Girl Cop and Clint Eastwood Cop. Or Scottish Cop and Irish Cop. Sith Cop and Jedi Cop (this one may require some work by the lawyers). Hat Cop and Shoe Cop. Time Cop and Space Cop. East Coast/West Coast Cops. A Cop, B Cop. Red Cop, Gleep Cop. Poo Cop, Pee Cop. You Cop, Me Cop. Jeff Goldblum Cop and Sam Neill Cop (for sweeps week, obviously). I’m Vegan But Thanks Cop and Always Dressed Like The Hamburglar Cop. There are thousands of possible pairings, all equally as compelling as throwing two characters together based on race. Maybe they can all get together. Maybe there will be a fight.

“Oh hell no,” someone will probably yell, and then someone else will do a karate kick. Did you imagine Black Cop or Asian Cop doing those things? You’re wrongit was Girl Cop, both times. Clint Eastwood Cop thinks that maybe, just maybe, this crazy dame is going to turn out all right.

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