Photo: Aaron P. Bernstein (Getty Images)

Ted Cruz, failed presidential candidate, prime suspect for the Zodiac murders, and noted fan of the Texas Longporns, is desperate to remind you he’s just a regular person. Like the rest of us, whose retrograde views on everything from women’s rights and gun violence to climate change also affect public policy, Cruz is just a normal fella with opinions on food and a fondness for internet memes.

See, for instance, this recent tweet, which, you’ll notice, is in the same format as the kind you see normal people using for jokes all the time:

Get it? Traditional-style Texas brisket is better than California barbecue and the mouse from Nickelodeon’s CatDog doesn’t like that sort of Blue State, Beto O’Rourke-sympathizing meat preparation either. Ha ha ha. What a guy!

If you’re one of those unfortunate enough to remember the history of this damned Twitter account, an attempt to cash in on a popular meme shouldn’t be surprising. Cruz has a long history of trying to slither his way into groups of ordinary people through pop culture, using everything from Simpsons references to Curb Your Enthusiasm and Back to the Future “jokes” to endear himself to the public.

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And if you checked out people’s reactions in the past, the response to Cruz’ most recent shot at resembling a human being is exactly what you’d expect. Your Twitter past, it always comes back to haunt you ...

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And, of course, there’s the expected, long-cherished standby itself:

As always, the funniest aspect of Cruz is his total inability to be funny himself. While everything else about his presence in public life brings horror to the world, the roughly man-shaped ball of slime’s commitment to presenting new opportunities for his ridicule offers a rare joy. Keep on tweeting, Ted, it’s by far the best use of your platform.

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