Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Stop on by your local fast food restaurant for "pee donuts" or a "99¢ sloppy"

Illustration for article titled Stop on by your local fast food restaurant for "pee donuts" or a "99¢ sloppy"
Photo: Mark Peterson (Getty Images)

Next to the occasional vanity license plate that manages to smuggle delightful stuff like “HU4TD” past nefarious DMV censors, the big signs posted outside fast food restaurants and strip malls provide the best numbskull laughs to be had for pranksters devoted to making public spaces funny.

Now, instead of just hoping the letters reading “BUTT” stay up outside your local pizza place long enough to show a friend, some of the best examples of the modern folk art of dumb store signs has been collected in a Twitter thread by @Ghobsmacka.

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Aside from the Walgreens advertisement to “Get your shongles shit today,” the photos included promises to supply interested customers with all sorts of other wonderful items, like “Pee donuts,” a “99¢ sloppy,” and, our personal favorite, “Bucket.”

When not telling passersby about their products, the signs may also try more active sales techniques by offering directions. “Wow come in,” one reads. “Love the little tacos love them good,” says another.

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After asking for other submissions, the original thread expanded with many, many other great examples of the sign pranksters’ underappreciated art. Among these, we see advertisements for the delicious “Optart,” “Ass combos,” and an unhinged announcement that pumpkin spice had once again come to Dunkin’ Donuts.

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We’re glad this thread exists, not just because we’re children who giggle mindlessly at a McDonald’s sign that contains nothing more than the word “Cone,” but also because the people who create these humble sources of joy deserve celebration—even if they have to remain anonymous in order not to lose their jobs.

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Send Great Job, Internet tips to gji@theonion.com

Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.

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