Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

So, uh ... who wants to read about some times Colin Jost pooped his pants?

Illustration for article titled So, uh ... who wants to read about some times Colin Jost pooped his pants?
Photo: Jeff Kravitz (Getty Images)

A new article from Vulture highlights a few passages from Colin Jost’s memoir, A Very Punchable Face, reminding readers that the Saturday Night Live writer/actor also has a very punchable mind filled with very punchable opinions. Among them are Jost’s views on minimum wage (“nine dollars an hour” is “really good for a summer job. Or any job in general”), thoughts on actors like his fiance playing other ethnicities and genders (of course they should be able to!), and that he liked that Trump came to rehearsals for his pre-2016 election episode without bodyguards (“I think most people at our show thought, Huh. This guy isn’t a monster after all.”)

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Fortunately, all of this is balanced out with memoir extracts that show how the universe’s corrective power works upon Jost. In short, he apparently shits his pants a whole lot.

The book’s most valuable information contains tidbits like Jost saying he “shit his pants ‘like five times’” within “the first five years” after graduating college. Jost, who “devotes an eight-page chapter to” the topic,” writes that he’s kept up this streak, “cruising along at a ‘Shit My Pants Once Every Year Or Two’ kind of pace.”

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We can only wonder if his body is rejecting what its brain comes up with as Jost, who seems to have no interest in not coming across like a prick in these memoir selections, also tells readers lots of other unflattering stuff about himself. He says that one of his first projects was “a hidden-camera-show concept” pitched alongside fellow Harvard grad Simon Rich that would’ve offered “fake college interviews for elite, competitive schools” in an attempt to “exploit high school seniors at their most vulnerable.” Jost also casually mentions that he threw a rented bike “over the fence of a construction site at the Musée d’Orsay.” The only solace is that this came after a bunch of French teenagers threw tomatoes at him on the street, which to most people might combine with the serial pants-shitting as a sign that it’s time to make some life changes.

Read more excerpts from Jost’s memoir over at Vulture.

Send Great Job, Internet tips to gji@theonion.com

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Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.

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