Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Since reading’s for squares, here are some audiobooks of movie novelizations

Earlier this week, The A.V. Club reported on Wes Craven’s original draft for A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. It was of note that the novelization, released in 1987, was actually based on Craven’s draft, not the final script. This kind of thing happened all the time when tie-in novels of films were a perfect marketing tool, particularly for genre pieces aimed towards fifth graders and teenagers. Studios would want the adaptation out in time to coincide with the film’s release, so extra scenes—or in the case of Dream Warriors, a completely different version of the story—would be available at the book fair. The Ghostbusters adaptation contains the job at Fort Detmerring (which was re-edited into the ghost blowjob scene), Return Of The Jedi features Obi-Wan revealing to Luke the details of his first duel with Anakin Skywalker, and Jaws 2 features the shark’s “inner goddess” providing insight into the Carcharodon carcharias’ motivation for chomping down on teenagers.

Phil Noble Jr. over at Birth Movies Death uncovered a webpage, Audio Books For The Damned, that features staff members reading the adaptations out loud for those of you that don’t have time to read books that were generally written at a fifth grade level. The readings are available on their YouTube page, and feature a wealth of titles ranging from The Terminator to David Cronenberg’s The Brood to the novelization of a movie adapted from a video game (Super Mario Bros.). They’re perfect for long car rides or just an opportunity to delve into another vision of your favorite films.

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