How do you talk to your mom or dad about Tekashi 6ix9ine? It’s a topic they don’t cover in all those fancy parent-rearing classes or books, presumably because it’s fraught with opportunities for distraction, confusion, and dismay. Do you start with the hair, or the face tattoos? Will they understand what a Nine Trey Blood is, and what the distinction means when Cardi B says she didn’t roll with that particular set? What about the time he testified in court about his dick? Heck, are you going to have to explain what 69 is to your mom, just to get past his name?
It’s a complicated topic, obviously. Luckily, Showtime is here to help you out, announcing today that it’s launching a three-part docuseries about the SoundCloud rapper/federal witness, titled SuperVillain—a title which definitely shouldn’t go to his already inflated sense of “I don’t need witness protection” invulnerability. Based on Stephen Witt’s Rolling Stone profile of the rapper, which was published back in January of 2019—i.e., like, 5,000 death threats ago—the show will track Daniel Hernandez’s transformation into the still-pretty-damn-difficult-to-type-out rapper, followed by his sudden rise to fame on the back of songs like “Gummo,” early troubles with the law, and then his eventual arrest for his association with the Nine Trey Bloods. (And though this material moves past Witt’s original article, also, presumably, his time spilling a wide variety of flavors of tea in open court.)
Anyway, we can only assume that the director of the series will end up having to film the ending like Clue, in a desperate attempt to stay ahead of the multiple outcomes, mostly bad, that could be expected to stem from this case. But hey: At least your parents will stop asking you why cult leader Jim Jones was allegedly trying to have this guy killed.