Credit: Win McNamee / Staff / Getty

Jesus H. Christ, we’ve been through this before. Is this a rite of passage among press secretaries? Your only job is to go up there and say nothing. You defer, you feign ignorance, you pass the buck, you obfuscate, you do nothing that can be read into and you absolutely do not do anything that can be taken out of context. If you toss on, say, your favorite emerald green shirt, do you know what will happen? That shit will get taken way out of context.

Advertisement

The hole in the time-space continuum at the end there is a reference to Sean Spicer’s green-tie mishap from way back in March of this year, when there was still a semblance of joy in his eyes.

Given that we appear to be on a nightmarish merry-go-round in which the people and their fuck-ups change hands but the basic blur of malevolent incompetence remains the same, we look forward to Huckabee Sanders’ eventual disappearance into a some bushes, a few panic-induced threats to the fourth estate, surprisingly vituperative behind-the-scenes bickering, and, finally, sweet release. Just look at Sean now!

Advertisement

You’ll be there in six months, Huckabee Sanders. Just stop wearing green for the time being.