Being president isn’t all fancy state dinners and private screenings of Star Wars. Sometimes the Commander-In-Chief has to make some really tough decisions, like whether to break the news to a wounded veteran that, although he truly wishes it weren’t so, he is the President of The United States of America and not the lead singer of Korn. But according to Rolling Stone, a heavy-hearted President Obama did just that at the White House yesterday afternoon.
Backing up a bit: The odd assertion took place at a ceremony awarding the Medal of Honor to U.S. Army captain Florent Groberg, who sustained serious injuries to his leg after he tackled a suicide bomber in Afghanistan in 2012, saving the lives of several of his comrades. It took three years for Groberg to fully recover from his injuries, and he spent an extended period of time in the hospital, during which time he was visited by—wait for it—none other than Korn frontman Jonathan Davis, because nothing says “thank you for your service” like a little one-on-one time with the guy who sang “Freak On A Leash.” Groberg was on pain medication during the meeting, and later said that he thought he had hallucinated the whole thing. That’s what Obama was referring to when he said this:
Obama continued, “Flo thought, ‘What’s going on? Am I hallucinating?’ But he wasn’t. It was all real. And so today, Flo, I want to assure you, you are not hallucinating. You are actually in the White House. Those cameras are on. I am not the lead singer from Korn. We are here to award you our nation’s highest military distinction.”
For his part, Davis—who really missed an opportunity by not captioning that post “Obama’s gotta always be messing with me”—referred to the president as an “Illuminati puppet” on noted conspiracy nut Alex Jones’ radio program last February. Speaking of, Donald Trump is presumably busy preparing a speech demanding Obama produce official paperwork proving that he’s not the singer from Korn.