Photo: AFP Contributor (Getty Images)

Urban legends speak of a person, driving through a deserted town on a dark and stormy night, who had to go to the bathroom really badly. With no stores open and the streets empty, this person is said to have driven frantically to the edge of the woods, desperate to find relief anywhere they could. A small shack peeked out from the shoulder of an unexpected rest area next to the road, a single bare light bulb illuminating a sign just above its door that read, simply, “TOILET.” The person is said to have rushed into the shack, crashed through the door to a stall, and then simply disappeared altogether. In the night sky just above the hastily parked car, a demonic face flashed like lightning and a sound like a gigantic flush filled the air.

While children still tell this story with flashlights beneath their chins, savoring every grim detail, nobody really believes it could be true. “Toilets are safe,” we scoff. “They would never hurt you.” Consider, though, a Twitter account documenting, bowl by bowl, the most terrifying toilets in the world, and reevaluate all you think you know.

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The aptly named Toilets With Threatening Auras curates every variety of scary toilet, moving from the category of outright dangerous (as above) to more subtle forms of terror.

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Some of these include deeply unsettling toilet modifications ...

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... while others depict ad-hoc designs whose implications, when thought about for more than a moment or two, are far more troubling.

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Most frightening of all are photos showing one or more toilet caught in the middle of what look to be forbidden rituals.

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The Twitter feed is a seemingly endless collection of upsetting toilets. New surprises appear regularly, showing that the world of bathrooms, like the deepest depths of the ocean, is full of mysteries more awful than mortal minds are meant to comprehend. No urban legend could ever be more unbelievable than this strange collection. Nothing we can dream up is worse than reality. There are toilets everywhere and they’re capable of horror.

[via Boing Boing]

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