The saying goes that an infinite number of monkeys working at an infinite number of typewriters for an infinite amount of time will eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare. What renowned simian collective YouTube has produced today, however, is Michael Jackson’s “Smooth Criminal” with every other beat removed.

This particular version of “Smooth Criminal” has a few things going for it. For one thing, you can watch it in half the time of the original, which is helpful if you are very busy but also criminally insane. For another, it now sounds like Michael Jackson is singing about returning your Nintendo but getting blood on your carpet in the process, which seems more or less how that would actually go. It is, at the very least, on par with Alien Ant Farm’s version.

This video comes from YouTube channel EveryOtherBeat, which does exactly what it says on the tin. Here’s radio-rock hit “Pompeii” getting the treatment:

And, because this is the internet and there is decorum to be observed, here’s Smash Mouth’s “All-Star”:

Well done, monkeys. You’ve earned your bananas for today.

Here’s the original version, if for some reason you have a whole 9 minutes to spare:

[via Boing Boing]

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