In a move likely to shock no one, Paula Abdul has announced she's leaving American Idol. The reason: Adbul's not saying, but it no doubt has a lot to do with the sputtering contract negotiations of recent days. According to People, Abdul broke the news on Twitter thusly: "With sadness in my heart, I’ve decided not to return to Idol." Then the tweets took a self-aggrandizing turn: "I’ll miss nurturing all the new talent,but most of all being a part of a show that I helped from day1become an international phenomenon."

There's no word yet on where Abdul will next be slurring inappropriate comments. For now, let's remember happier times: