Celebrity photos are subjected to Photoshop all the time, either by publicists seeking to clear up unwanted perceived defects, or by the people of the Internet in order to, for example, celebrate an actor’s particularly amusing facial feature. Media designer Philip Pastore has added his own take on the fine art of digitally deforming the great and beautiful with his new Tumblr, Nosemouth. With the straightforward slogan, “All nose. No mouth,” Nosemouth operates on a very simple principle: Give someone a giant nose and take away their mouth, and they suddenly look very, very funny, and very, very creepy.
So far, Pastore has subjected celebrities like James Franco, Justin Timberlake, Miley Cyrus, and many more to the amusing/horrifying procedure. He’s even produced a few animated images, like this one, where Zach Galifianakis’ eyes seem to seduce you from just above a majestically enlarged schnoz. “Hey there, baby,” his eyes and nose seem to say, because his mouth can’t, because he has no mouth and he must flirt.
It’s hard to parse exactly why these are so hilarious. There’s something, though, about the cartoonishness of the noses, and the way they overtake the space of the mouth, transforming the world’s most beautiful people into goofy-looking bird gnome things.
We can only hope that Pastore never hooks up with the people behind Chicks With Steve Buscemeyes, because the result would certainly be the Photoshopped Beast Of The Apocalypse, long prophesied to herald the ending of the world in a deadly rain of drop shadows and lens flares.