Normally taciturn Oasis guitarist Noel Gallagher has boldly broken his silence to offer his opinions on this year's Glastonbury festival, and surprise: He's got 99 problems with it, starting with the bookers' decision to offer Jay-Z the headlining slot. In a statement to BBC News, Gallagher said he believes that deviating from the festival's "tradition of guitar music" is a bad move, saying, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" before declaring, "I'm not having hip-hop at Glastonbury. It's wrong." Perhaps Coldplay's Chris Martin—an occasional Liam Gallagher substitute—needs to step in and play mediator?