Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Nas/Diddy-brand fine spirits in the offing?

As the hip-hop world's love-hate tussle with the makers of Cristal rages on, Nas, in typical dignified hip-hop fashion, is looking for a business solution. AllHipHop.com's on it:

Nas is in full support of a continued, formal boycott of Cristal–but only if hip hop steps up to replace the champagne, which typically sells for $50-$600 per bottle.

"I support a boycott if we could come up–like if we put up something, our own champagne. There's tons of vineyards we could get into and buy," Nas told AllHipHop.com in response to controversial comments made by Cristal's managing director against rappers who drink the beverage.

"There's tons of ways to get inside of that, so that we can have 'Diddy / Nas champagne' and put them out, and drink our own thing."

Diddy told AllHipHop.com, "Cristal definitely caught us out there. It was a learning lesson. At the end of the day, fuck Cristal. They don't respect us. They'll feel it."

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"Fuck Cristal"? OK, Diddy, maybe you can live without it the drink itself, but you know what you can't live without? Its combination of alcohol, luxury, and a deliciously stretchable vowel that makes it so helpful in a rap song: "Cristaaaaaaal." Martell cognac isn't a bad fill in, but it just doesn't sound as exotic, and mescal, the booze that sounds most like Cristal, is too often thought of as tequila's filthy cousin. And all the names of single-malt scotches are just a little too full of weird Celtic phoenetics. Laphroaig? Good luck making that sound slick. Looks like Diddy and Nas need to hit the vineyards on the double and consult all the world's finest rappers to come up with a decently euphonious name.

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