Pundits credit Morrissey's song "America Is Not The World"—specifically the line "America, where the President is never black, female, or gay"—with Barack Obama's ascent into the White House, so you'd think that Obama would repay the famously vegetarian singer by offering only Tofurkey at official functions. But no, like so many Presidents before him, Obama will "pardon" one turkey this year, and let the rest die. Morrissey, who happens to be promoting his best-selling new Autobiography, has issued a statement via True To You (his official site) titled "Thankskilling," which as you can probably imagine from that title, is not very festive. It continues: "45 million birds are horrifically abused; dragged through electrified stun baths, and then have their throats slit. And President Obama laughs. Haha, so funny!" ("But Uncle Steve, we ordered this year's turkey from one of those free-range organic farms!")
In other Moz news, the singer and his band will perform at the Nobel Peace Prize event on December 11 in Oslo, and his face appears on some new PETA postage stamps featuring famous vegetarians. He joins Casey Affleck, Sarah Silverman, and Paul McCartney on said stamps, which can be purchased here. (Buying one sheet of these delightful, actually useable stamps allows the purchaser moral license to eat one turkey drumstick tomorrow—limited time offer, while supplies last.) Happy Thankskilling, y'all!