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Millionaire wants to stage real-life battle royale on private island, which should go fine

Photo: Richard Baker (Getty Images)

Having amassed an unreasonable fortune, it would be unimaginable to just give some of it away to people who have nothing or create charities that better society as a whole. Instead, the disgustingly wealthy must get creative, dreaming up novel ways to spend their money like, say, contracting a real-life battle royale on a private island.

As spotted by IGN, an anonymous person who probably found a lot to admire in Gary Busey’s Surviving The Game character, is looking to set up a three-day event where 100 people get together and hunt one another in the wilderness. To do so, they apparently approached the indirect guillotine-marketers at HushHush, a London-based “luxury shopping marketplace and shopping concierge service” that sells essential items like bottled Everest oxygen and crystal-encrusted vacuum cleaners.

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This grand Fortnite LARP, too cowardly to go all the way, see attendees “provided with Airsoft guns [and] ammo and touch-sensitive body armour for a three-day event” with a £100,000 prize ready and waiting for whichever weekend Predator is best prepared to slip off the shackles of the civilized world and systematically eliminate their colleagues.

The competition will run for 12 hours each day before “food, camping gear, and all the necessary equipment” will be handed out to the sleepy cosplay killers. At this point, they’ll be given time to make camp for the night and, we assume, share stories about their best PUBG wins while toasting marshmallows around the fire.

Apparently unafraid that they may be organizing the Fyre Festival of people actually murdering each other, HushHush is soliciting a “talented gamemaker who can help...design the arena.” With “an expected six-week project duration” and a £45,000 contract up for grabs, we’re sure only the most experienced and safety-minded will be on board to make sure nobody puts live rounds in the model guns or digs camouflaged holes filled with sharpened sticks in the middle of the night.

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About the author

Reid McCarter

Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.