My fellow Americans, today's latest siege by the corrupt Hollywood Liberal cabal suggested that maybe all our celebrities are popping free birth control before hopping into a hot three-way with Obama and Satan. But rest assured, some famous people still have a level head—famous, famously levelheaded people like Meat Loaf, who recently offered his first-ever political endorsement by stumping for Mitt Romney, with Mr. Loaf citing as his reasons a troubling thunderstorm system that threatens to dampen the whole world's weekend plans forever, and the fact that Meat Loaf can't believe Obama thinks the Cold War with Russia is really over when Rocky IV just came out, like, yesterday.
But Meat Loaf didn't merely offer his support to his fellow man who would do anything for love (BUT NOT RUSSIA). He also demonstrated it with a passionate rendition of Romney's favorite rock song, "America The Beautiful," joining his fellow Celebrity Apprentice contestant John Rich in battling the Red Menace by pretending the microphone was a pinko Ruskie, and shoving those lyrics right in its commie face.
Go ahead now, brothers. Have a beautiful, American weekend.