Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Let out your pandemic rage with this new COVID testing method

Laura Dern, queen of screaming on screen
Laura Dern, queen of screaming on screen
Screenshot: Big Little Lies (HBO)

We’ve spent nearly a year having our brains poked with a nasal swabs on a regular basis. Maybe you’re one of those weirdos who discovered that it feels like a nose orgasm, or you’ve done everything possible to avoid having a foreign object that isn’t the “fun” kind up your nostrils. If you’re part of the latter group, there’s good news! Reuters reports that Dutch inventor Peter Van Wees has come up with what he hopes is a less painful — and very cathartic — method for COVID testing.

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Here’s how it works: Van Wees asks participants to get inside an airlocked cabin and scream. They also have the option of singing—but without a few drinks in us, screaming sounds a lot more fun. Then, an industrial air purifier gathers the particles emitted, and those are analyzed. The whole process takes just 3 minutes.

As Van Wees explains, “If you have coronavirus and are infectious and yelling and screaming, you are spreading tens of thousands of particles which contain coronavirus.” To test it out, Van Wees set up shop next to a coronavirus testing center, so he could try it out on people who’d just been tested.

So does it actually work? As of right now, Van Wees is “working with a private company to marshal evidence for his strategy.” Hopefully it does work, because who doesn’t need a good scream these days?