Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Illustration for article titled iKickboxer/i remake to entertain new generation of 1990s-era dorm rooms

Producers continue to tap the rich vein of creative inspiration to be found in 1990s-era dorm rooms, moving forward with their previously reported remake of Kickboxer, in addition to those previously announced updates of other Jean-Claude Van Damme movies Bloodsport and Timecop, and the still-in-development film based on Trevor’s story about drinking too much Goldschläger. Like the 1989 original, this Kickboxer for a new generation will follow two Americans as they travel to a foreign land to compete in the titular sport against the brutal Tong Po—this time with Hong Kong standing in for Thailand, and the WWE’s Dave Bautista, UFC fighter Georges St. Pierre, and stuntman Alain Moussi combining forces to equal the acting prowess of a single Van Damme.


Also like the 1989 original, it will provide endless hours of sort-of being on in the background while a Trevor for a new generation calls that freshman girl who was in his orientation group, even though she said she has a boyfriend. And as a “Never Surrender” for a new generation plays over its end credits, Trevor will prove hilariously unsuccessful in his attempt to get her to come up and “just chill.”

The Kickboxer remake is being directed by Stephen Fung, who has enjoyed success with martial arts movies like Tai Chi Zero and Tai Chi Hero, and leaves pretty much only Lionheart to be remade from the classic “Someone Jean-Claude Van Damme Loves Is Hurt Or Killed In A Martial Arts Contest, So He Gets Revenge Using Martial Arts” series. But you can probably expect to see a Lionheart remake right around the time Trevor finally scores (i.e., never).

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