When Justin Bieber decided to clean up his act a few years ago, he did so by getting horrible tattoos, hanging with the world’s bro-iest Christians, and rapping about ass. And, since then, we’ve watched his aesthetic and public perception mutate like so many werewolves, from reformed paramour to casual narcissist to “Latin king.” This weekend, we were introduced to Bieber’s latest evolution: Pre-McConaissance Matthew McConaughey. And we don’t mean The Lincoln Lawyer McConaughey; we’re talking pot-and-bongos McConaughey. We’re talking Surfer, Dude McConaughey.
As you can see both above and below, Bieber, his vision clearly obscured by Xanax eyelids and a haze of sativa smoke, clearly slipped into the first pieces of clothing he could grasp: Some XL Hawaiian gear, pink bucket hat, Gucci cross-body, socks that wouldn’t mask the the terrifying Christ tattoo on his left calf. Of course, such sloppiness is part-and-parcel of Coachella, where his dance moves mirrored his style.
And, of course, the McConaughey likeness wasn’t lost on fellow attendees, here filming Harmony Korine’s upcoming The Beach Bum, presumably as the titular character:
The good news is that, this time around, Bieber wasn’t dragged out of the festival by his throat. He still got in a fight, of course, but at least this time he was defending somebody. We think? Luckily, that fight wasn’t with the now-ubiquitous Walmart Yodeler, who Bieber visited with after watching the boy do his thing. Stereogum shared a video capturing Bieber’s enjoyment of the performance, as well as the sweet, thunderingly awkward exchange the pair shared afterwards.
Yes, Justin Bieber may dress like an asshole, but let it be known that he’s as bad at small talk the rest of us. And, hey, at least he didn’t charge the kid $2,000 for that selfie.