John Oliver, destroyer of pumpkin spice, booster of women engineers, and sworn enemy of April Fools’ Day, has now himself been destroyed in an epic takedown. Last night, Oliver jokingly announced that he was shutting down Last Week Tonight, saying, “we have accomplished everything we set out to do on this show ... Goodbye forever, everyone” after being irrevocably one-upped by actor Russell Crowe, who put the money Oliver spent on his old jock strap into the creation of the John Oliver Koala Chlamydia Ward.
A little much-needed background: This all started when Oliver placed a winning bid on the leather jockstrap Crowe wore in his film Cinderella Man, which went up for auction last month along with a plethora of other Crowe-related movie memorabilia in Crowe’s pithily titled “The Art Of Divorce.” Oliver then donated the jockstrap to the last remaining Blockbuster Video in Alaska, where it is currently on display. (We realize this reads like a drunken game of Mad Libs, but it actually happened. Click the links.) Not to be outdone, Crowe took the money he received from Oliver and did this:
Apparently, chlamydia is a serious threat to the already-vulnerable Australian wild koala population, which has dropped 80 percent in the past 10 years. The STD affects koalas more severely than it does humans, causing blindness and infertility, and can be passed from a mother koala to her joey through her pouch. So Crowe is actually doing good here, along with executing a veritable triple axel of an own. Just say it out loud. “John Oliver Koala Chlamydia Ward.” It rolls off the tongue so beautifully.
HBO recently renewed Last Week Tonight With John Oliver through 2020, in case you were unsure if he was really joking or not.