Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

John Cena now officially Fast & Furious, so hey, watch out

Illustration for article titled John Cena now officially iFast  Furious/i, so hey, watch out
Photo: VALERIE MACON / AFP (Getty Images)

In an announcement that would be absolutely terrifying in almost any other context—on account of him being so big and strong, you see—John Cena is now officially both Fast and Furious. As Deadline reports, the Blockers star has just formally signed on to the Vin Diesel automotive movie franchise, having been guided there (according to Diesel) by the spirit of the late Paul Walker, and also probably his agents and managers and stuff.


Cena will appear in 2020's Fast & Furious 9, reportedly taking the place of that other terrifyingly-large-former-wrestler-turned-surprisingly-capable-comedy-star, Dwayne Johnson, who was quietly spun off into his own car-smashing sub-franchise after that whole CandyAssGate thing. We can only hope Cena will be able to navigate the tricky waters of Fast & Furious franchise drama with less obvious struggle—and also the comparatively much simpler world of Fast & Furious movie drama, which is mostly about yelling the word “family” until it’s time to shoot a car with a harpoon.

Fast & Furious 9 is currently set for a May 22, 2020 release; franchise mainstay Justin Lin will reportedly return to direct.

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