The fourth season of Jersey Shore is intended to add a little culture clash to MTV’s sociological experiment, uprooting the proudly self-proclaimed “real Italians” of the American Northeast and dropping them in Florence to see what actual real Italians have to say about all that. (Although they sort of already have, with Roman columnist Roberto Del Bove writing last month that "they embody the worst stereotypes of Italians, multiplied by thousands and Americanized"—but dude, just wait until you get to know them!) Yet before the cast has even so much as passed out on a piazza, Mayor Matteo Renzi has reportedly already laid down a long litany of ground rules that the show will have to follow in order to film there—rules that all but guarantee nothing at all like Jersey Shore will take place on this season of Jersey Shore. The list, as printed in Italy’s Corriere Della Sera and excerpted by the New York Post:

- The cast will not be filmed in bars and clubs that serve alcohol.

- The cast will not be filmed drinking in public.

- The show will not be filmed to promote Florence as a drinking town.

- The show should be filmed in a manner to promote Italy (not Americans visiting Italy) and feature its culture and good food.

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In addition, filming will not be allowed inside any of the city’s historic buildings—although the mayor has acknowledged that he can't prevent them from using them in the background. So all told, he’s essentially guaranteed an entire season of the cast pounding drinks in their apartment before staggering out to barf all over the basilicas. Either that, or they’ll use this opportunity to gain some perspective on their inflated cultural identities, and set aside their petty squabbles to grow as people, all while expanding their understanding of their place in the world. Yes, probably one of those two things.