After the enormous hullabaloo over Downton Abbey and the ridiculous ratings it nabbed, UK network ITV is eagerly taking another stab at the costume drama game with a semi-historical series called Mr. Selfridge, chronicling the sexy, sexy life of American department store founder Harry Gordon Selfridge. The series, created by Bridget Jones’ Diary screenwriter Andrew Davies, is based on the book Shopping, Seduction, And Mr. Selfridge, and it all sounds a bit like Mad Men meets True Life: I’m Working Retail In The 1900s. Deadline reports that Jeremy Piven, apparently tired of roles that consist of him yelling and throwing computer monitors, is in negotiations to star as Selfridge. The good news: We will probably see Jeremy Piven in a monocle and waxed mustache. The bad news: Pretty much everything else about this series sounds less entertaining than seeing Jeremy Piven in a monocle and waxed mustache.