Garfield has been around since the dawn of time, drolly reflecting on Mondays, lasagna, the meaninglessness of existence, and how pleasant it is to be asleep. Jim Davis’ decision to turn his creation into every possible form of merchandise over the course of decades has resulted in more shitty Garfield products than can be imagined, a phenomenon that a new Twitter account ably illustrates.
Many of the posts show an orange substance that does not look at all like Garfield, like this fun boy:
Or this pewter idol:
Or whatever the sweet merciful fuck this is:
There is a Garfield for every season, because people will buy anything if it vaguely relates to an upcoming occasion and features a safe, known commercial property.
There are knockoff Garfields, such as this one, tossed on top of a tawdry pile of money:
— Chris™ (@Tukboi) February 24, 2017
Here the orange cat plays the saxophone in what may as well be a timely Bill Clinton riff:
This Garfield probably whispers “kill me” when you squeeze it:
In less than a week, @ebaygarfield has posted some 168 Garfields from the online auction site. Jim Davis has probably licensed as many new Garfield-related plushies in the same amount of time, thus feeding the yawning maw.