Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

If every COVID-19 commercial feels the same, it’s because they totally are

Illustration for article titled If every COVID-19 commercial feels the same, it’s because they totally are
Screenshot: YouTube

If you’ve binged anything on cable and/or Hulu these past few weeks, you’ve probably noticed the new wave of commercials promising viewers that all will be well in due time and that, now reassured of this, we should go ahead and keep spending our money. What makes it all feel that much ickier is that every one of these societal assurance advertisements airing right now seems to be following the exact same playbook.

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Just take a look at this new supercut of COVID-19 commercials from YouTube channel Microsoft Sam.

The soft, soothing instrumentation. The polite reminder of said company’s history. The vague platitudes of togetherness and looking towards a brighter future. The endless recitation of phrases like “times like these,” “more than ever,” “home,” “family,” and “here for you.” Honestly, we wouldn’t be surprised if these ads have been hiding in some commercial vault, just waiting to be used once the next generational disaster hit.

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There’s only one way to redeem all this, of course: a “long-lost” Mad Men scene involving Don Draper pitching a Juul campaign to quarantined consumers. C’mon. You’re telling us we can get a bonus episode of Tiger King, but not that?

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Andrew Paul is a contributing writer with work recently featured by NBC Think, GQ, Slate, Rolling Stone, and McSweeney's Internet Tendency. He writes the newsletter, (((Echo Chamber))).

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