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Hot damn, the Mooch might actually fire everyone

Credit: Mark Wilson / Staff / Getty

On Tuesday, new White House communications director Anthony Scaramucci said that if he had to fire everyone in his department to stop the leaks to the press, he would. Maybe you thought he was bluffing. We did.

But friends, the Mooch does not fucking bluff. He’s gone straight at the man Ben Carson once called “Reince Pubis.”


In a bizarre series of events, Scaramucci went from last week saying he and Priebus are “brothers” to saying on CNN today that, “Some brothers are like Cain and Abel, other brothers can fight with each other and then get along. I don’t know if this is reparable or not; that will be up to the president.” It’s unclear if Scaramucci knows how Cain and Abel cleared things up, or that this sort of makes Donald Trump God in that analogy.

Today the Mooch called in to CNN’s New Day to recap some wild shit he did, like calling Preibus out on Twitter at 11 p.m. last night for leaking Scaramucci’s financial information to the press, and then deleting the tweet.

Incidentally, no one leaked anything of the sort, says Politico reporter Lorraine Woellert, who wrote the story about Scaramucci’s financial disclosure.


The information is, per the Washington Post, available publicly.

But the Mooch was seeing red. On CNN he trotted out some classic Italian wisdom, reaffirmed his bond with the president, and mentioned—not without some wistfulness—that “150 years ago, people would actually have been hung [sic] for those types of leaks.”

The full 30-minute interview is here, if you’re curious. He quotes Joe Paterno.

Now, Mad Dog Scaramucci says he initially tagged Reince for an entirely different reason: to present a united front to any leakers who might be watching.


That said, he also said on CNN that “if Reince wants to explain that he’s not a leaker, let him do that,” which seems awfully confrontational and Jesus Christ what the hell are these morons even doing. If the Mooch is not actually targeting Priebus he is doing a pretty bad job of… communicating that.


Let’s just leave it here for now:


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