Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Here's an ambient workplace noise generator for all you freaks who miss going to the office

Illustration for article titled Heres an ambient workplace noise generator for all you freaks who miss going to the office
Photo: View Pictures (Getty Images)

For a lot of people, one of the pandemic’s very few silver linings is they don’t have to go into the office for a while. Rather than being forced to make a daily commute, muster up small talk with people you’d go out of your way to avoid in any other situation, and endure the stench of whatever fish creations a co-workers decided to heat up in the microwave, many of those fortunate enough to still have their jobs get to bask in the novelty of calling into meetings and completing routine tasks in their underwear.

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Still, there are real degenerates out there who actually enjoy working in their offices—people who are likely feeling pretty shitty knowing that it could be a lot longer before they’re able to get back to their usual routine. We are happy to provide them with something tailor-made for their perverse needs: A website filled with background office noises called “I Miss The Office.”

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The site, created by the Kids Creative Agency, shows a minimalist floor plan of a modern work space, each room home to objects like chairs and printers, water coolers and computers. These can be clicked on to activate a signature noise. Perfect for an infant CEO-in-training, the site functions like a sound-enabled picture book. The printer says “beep-beep;” the chair says “squeak;” the computer says “clack-clack-clack.”

Turn on enough of them and these noises mostly settle into the background after you’ve been listening to them for a few minutes, creating a gentle ambience. When enough colleagues, represented by various colored shapes, have been added to the office by increasing a ticker at the bottom right corner of the screen, though, the site begins to sound a bit more like a bustling space.

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We could’ve sworn, at one point, one of the co-workers coughed and another sneezed a few times. Maybe, even if you’re the kind of person who’s currently pining for the return of their cubicle, that’s a good reminder not to rush back into things.

[via Boing Boing]

Send Great Job, Internet tips to gji@theonion.com

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Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.

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