Marvel's Star Wars #3

Now that the Star Wars Extended Universe is no longer canon, there are plenty of writers, filmmakers, and other creative types looking to fill in the gaps with their takes on origin stories of favorite characters. Self-proclaimed “fat geek” Guillermo del Toro, for example, wants to tackle the origins of Jabba The Hutt. “It’s the character that looks the most like me and I love him,” del Toro jokes.

The filmmaker goes onto explain to Yahoo! News that he would love to create a Godfather-type saga delving into the seedy underworld of the Hutts. His version would tell the story of how the Tattooine gangster gained control of the Hutt mafia—picture a single tracking shot of Jabba whisking Princess Leia through the basement of Mos Eisley Cantina as a table for two swings into frame for a front row seat for Figrn D’an and the Modal Nodes.

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Of course, this is all conjecture, as the Hutt mafia does not exist. “This is not real,” del Toro is careful to explain. “This is me as a fat geek just geeking out and talking about it.” That being said, it wouldn’t be unprecedented if Jabba The Hutt got an opportunity to leave the blaster and take the Snackquarium full of frogs: Both Boba Fett and Han Solo are rumored to be receiving the origin story treatment, and Disney is always looking for a chance to sell new figures to the Star Wars faithful. With the Extended Universe having been banished to the Great Pit Of Carkoon, audiences can only hope that his effeminate uncle, Ziro, will be ignored like so many midichlorians.