Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Is there anything sweeter than the dreams of a 13-year-old girl? Splattered blood. Severed heads. Impaled babysitters. In this case, the 13-year-old girl doing the dreaming is South Jersey resident Emily DiPrimio, a horror movie enthusiast who's been making splatter films with her dad since she was four. Now, they're turning to Kickstarter in an attempt to raise $25,000 so that they can co-direct Carver, a feature-length "'80s style slasher film" that they wrote together. Skeptics may assume that Emily's father Ron DiPrimio, an amateur filmmaker with a couple DIY projects on his IMDB page, will be doing most of the heavy lifting here, and, okay, they're probably right. Still, Emily is 13-years-old, and just getting to be there for all the decision-making and squib-bursting would be an invaluable and formative experience for an impressionable cinematic mind.

The DiPrimios have currently raised about 20 percent of their pledge target with three weeks to go, so things are probably going to have to pick up somewhat if they're going to make it. There are some incentives. For $5,000 you get killed on screen, but for $10,000 you can help write your own death scene. Of course, you can probably get someone to really kill you for less than that, but you'd probably have less creative input. Interestingly, among the 163 people who have already pitched in for the project is scream queen Barbara Crampton, who's probably best remembered as the terrified woman strapped to the lab table in the 1985 cult-classic Re-Animator. Hopefully, Emily's not too familiar with that scene, though. Thirteen is maybe a little young to understand what naked ladies and decapitated heads choose to do behind closed doors.


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