Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Fox News warns that The Lorax and The Secret World Of Arrietty are indoctrinating children with liberal agendas

Illustration for article titled Fox News warns that emThe Lorax/em and emThe Secret World Of Arrietty/em are indoctrinating children with liberal agendas

Today’s children have barely finished soaking up the leftist messages of Sesame Street and The Muppets with their malleable brain-sponges, but Hollywood has already entered the next phase of its insidious plan to turn them into weaklings who don’t just take everything they want all the time. Taking a brief pause from shaking an angry fist at his neighborhood taquerias, Lou Dobbs sounded the outrage alarm on Tuesday’s Lou Dobbs Tonight, alerting concerned parents to the underlying Obama-led agendas in both The Lorax and The Secret World Of Arrietty—agendas so disgustingly pervasive, they were first planted over half a century ago by “the president’s liberal friends in Hollywood” such as Dr. Seuss and English author Mary Norton, then brought to life by Obama’s super-duper liberal pals in Japan.

The Lorax, of course, is just another example of liberals “espousing green energy policy” such as not chopping down trees all the time. The Secret World Of Arrietty, meanwhile, is about little homeless people who redistribute wealth by “borrowing” what they need to survive—“plainly demonizing the 1 percent,” as Dobbs points out, while redistributing a tiny tear. “So, where have we all heard this before?” Dobbs asks himself before pulling out the smoking gun that Obama wants to take away, demonstrating that both movies echo “Occupy Wall Street forever trying to pit the makers against the takers and President Obama repeating that everyone should pay their fair share.” The latter even elicits a gallows humor chuckle and a “Wow, fair share” from Dobbs, who still can’t quite believe that Hollywood would be so brazen in its attempts to brainwash children into sharing and living as a responsible member of society—“society” being the root of “socialism,” after all.

Suspiciously, Dobbs then shares his show with three conservative radio hosts who are equally swollen with rage—save Steve Cochran, of course, who assures us that “I know the people in Hollywood and, frankly, they’re not that bright.” But since not everyone knows all the people in Hollywood like Cochran, Matt Patrick offers a more actionable solution to parents who don’t want to see their kids transformed into “occu-toddlers” (a phrase he no doubt immediately trademarked): Go see these movies anyway, then fight back by procuring “huge tubs of popcorn—ram it in your face,” then crinkle it all up and throw it on the floor. This will send the message that Americans have the right to buy a bunch of stuff, throw their trash everywhere, and behave like self-absorbed babies, just like it says in the Constitution.

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