Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Former Lost actor and horrible child bride demand a reality show, or they will continue to give interviews like this one

The publicity terrorism campaign of 51-year-old former Lost actor Doug Hutchison and his “child bride,” the world’s eldest 16-year-old Courtney Stodden, reached a new escalation with the couple’s below appearance on a talk show in Australia, confirming its global reach. Cradling their “family”—by which they mean Tuna, their bowtie-clad yorkie, and Bizarre, some sort of hot-pink hobgoblin—Hutchison and Stodden threatened to take their current jihad on the senses to the next level with “a reality show like no other.” While no network is attached so far, they say they have entered negotiations with a "prominent production team" and are demanding that some hypothetical channel bring to your living room on a weekly basis Stodden’s disconcerting habit of sensually biting and licking her lips as though constantly drawing your attention to a floating 1-900 number, as well as her Penthouse-worthy narration of the minutiae of her day, as currently seen on Twitter. (Typical tweet: “Off to run my productive-fulfilled errands under the humid sky, while nothing but utter sex-appeal slowly drips from my rill curvy-bod. ;-x”)

Until it rewards them with the attention and attendant money they seek, Hutchison and Stodden will continue to bombard the world with interviews like the one below, in which Stodden lists all the reasons why she loves her husband (“His face, his body, his sexy hair!”), and Hutchison muses on how Stodden “really embodies the classic, iconic figures of the past—the Marilyn Monroes, the Sharon Tates, the Pamela Andersons.” He then concludes, “The world should not forget beautiful women like that,” whatever that means, though it sounds vaguely like a threat. Hutchison also actually says, “51+16 = love in our world,” to which Stodden adds, “Sexy love!” Again, this will not stop until they get what they want. [Celebitchy via Best Week Ever]


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