Star Wars fans are known for being, let’s say, detail-oriented generally, and particularly when it comes to their beloved collectibles. So it’s not surprising to hear that the new line of Force Awakens toys—which will be released on September 4 and dissected in minute detail for months thereafter—will be unveiled in an unboxing video on YouTube, unboxing videos being the current craze among packaging fetishists and assorted collector types.
The unboxing, which a press release touts as an “Epic Global Event,” will be 18 hours long, which would be surprising, except that this is Star Wars. The video, which will be live streamed, will begin at 4:45 p.m. CT on Wednesday, September 2, coinciding with the toys’ release in Sydney, Australia. From there, the live stream will move east through 15 locations around the world, with YouTube personalities at each location unveiling a new toy every hour or so. Eventually, the live stream will end up at Lucasfilm’s offices in San Francisco, at which point Kathleen Kennedy will activate the mind-control chips contained within each product, compelling fans to buy multiples of everything.
Just kidding. They already do that on their own.