Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Illustration for article titled FIFA vanity projecti United Passions /ibreaks box-office record (not the good kind)

Step aside, Oogieloves. Suck it, I Kissed A Vampire. United Passions, the self-congratulatory FIFA vanity project that we’re sure could’ve been a Jurassic World-size success had it not debuted right as the officials it depicts as heroic anti-corruption fighters were arrested on corruption charges, has broken the record for worst box-office opening in U.S. history.


Things were already looking bad when the film made $607 in 10 theaters on its opening weekend, but now, 10 days later, the film has been pulled from U.S. theaters entirely with an abysmal box-office total of $918. That doesn’t quite make it the worst-grossing film of all time—the 2006 Tom Sizemore/Katherine Heigl thriller Zyzzyx Road, which made $30, retains that title—but it does make it the lowest-grossing film to actually receive limited theatrical distribution. (Zyzzyx Road played at one Texas theater, which the producers rented for $1,000.) United Passions‘ $60.70 per-screen average is less than one-third that of the notorious Oogieloves In The BIG Balloon Adventure, which made $206 per screen, and half of the jingoistic documentary Proud American, which made $128 per screen when it debuted in 2008. United Passions cost a reported $30 million to make.

However, according to The Guardian the film does seem to be faring better in Russia, where it’s made $158,000 so far. But it takes more than a little blatant hypocrisy to faze the Russians.

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