Photo: HBO

Watching Game of Thrones is a trip—from unexpected deaths to betrayals to incest, the show keeps you on the edge of your seat while occasionally culling a tear or two out from you. As it turns out, the actors are often as shocked and saddened by what they see on screen, despite being the ones delivering the deathblows. Take The Hound’s Rory McCann, for instance, who found a certain bloody wedding hard to watch.

In a recent video from HBO, McCann revealed that season 3's Red Wedding really did him in. “I watched the Red Wedding and I didn’t really read into it in the script of what happened,” he said. “I think I just did my bit and went, La la la. And then when it came out, I remember I watched in the morning. I’m a big guy, big tough guy, but guess what? I burst into tears. It was an absolute shocker. I remember just watching, going, ‘no, no, no, no! What!?’ It was brilliant.”

Imagining big, burly Hound cry on a sofa, bellowing at his TV to make it all stop, is quite the scene. But who could blame him? His character showed up at the end, whisking Arya away again when he realized shit had hit the fan. Seeing that for the first time with the world, and witnessing major, much-loved characters like Catelyn and Robb Stark get slaughtered is not for the faint of heart.

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Another moment that stood out to McCann was the one-on-one fight between him and Brienne of Tarth (Gwendoline Christie) in season 4. Christie agreed as well, and recently told Vulture that she’s most proud of that moment. “That’s the most of everything that you’ve seen from me. It was something I couldn’t believe I could achieve, retrospectively,” she recalled. “Looking back at it now it was so brutal, but I was really invigorated by that scene. It looked so real, but we made it very safe, and not one injury was incurred as a result of it. Rory and I were so connected and committed to the story line, and it was only afterwards I realized I was doing everything he was doing, but backwards and uphill! I was pretty delighted with that.” That scene might be one of the most impressive to viewers as well, as well as the most stressful, regardless of what side you were rooting for.

All this reminiscing might make you emotional before the season even starts. Maybe it’s the drought of Game of Thrones episodes fans have been forced to endure for more than a year, or maybe it’s just the thought of saying goodbye. But whatever it is, it’s going to make this season hard to get through.