Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Enlightened dog responds to human inanities with "blah blah blah"

Illustration for article titled Enlightened dog responds to human inanities with blah blah blah
Photo: Jim Corwin (Getty Images)

Dogs have it figured out. They’re smart enough to know how to do all sorts of things, but have also achieved a level of wisdom that lets them understand that, really, they can get away with just lying around being lazy and adorable instead. As shown in a recently resurfaced video from a few years ago, the most enlightened of their species have even learned to respond to whatever dumb shit we baby talk to them with a dismissive “blah blah blah.”

Look at this dog. Prompted by the humans around it, having heard more than enough of the condescending “good boys” or “good girls” and fed up with inane commands to sit or lie down at a moment’s notice, the dog shuts down a conversation by howling out an inter-species dismissal. It refuses to let a word in edgewise. When asked to “say hello” it rightly ignores this direction, continuing to recite “blah, blah, blah” over and over again instead. It’s listened to everything its humans have had to say before and found all of it wanting.

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Elsewhere on the internet, we see even more examples of the dogs deciding to leave our species behind. Not only have the animals given up on patiently listening to the dumb things we say, they’ve also learned how to entertain themselves without any human assistance. With no shaved apes to interfere, a dog can just be a dog, enjoying a snowy day by sledding down hills all on its own.

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Clearly, they are moving beyond us. It won’t be long now until entire dog cities are established. Their neighborhoods will be filled with dog restaurants where dog diners eat food prepared by dog chefs and dog gymnasiums where dogs throw tennis balls to other dogs. All memories of our nonsense will be forgotten then, replaced with a population of four-legged, pure-minded creatures, sniffing each other’s butts and standing around wailing “blah, blah, blah” at one another if any human dares to wander by and try to talk to them.

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Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.

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