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Endangered species known as “a good Terminator movie” returning to theaters in 3-D

Terminator 2

That most endangered of wildlife, an awesome Terminator movie, might be returning to theaters: According to The Hollywood Reporter, director and dork who won’t shut up about how cool it is underwater James Cameron is planning a 2016 theatrical re-release of Terminator 2 in 3-D. This will be one of the rare sightings of the genus Actually Goodus Terminatorus in its native habitat, a locale that in recent years has been overrun by competing breeds, McG Botchedus Shitfestaerae and Evenus Daenarys Cant Saveilia.

Naturally, a big part of the impetus for this is the existence of China, a country that is such a big fan of the species, it even welcomes the other, more recent breeds. And since the earlier Terminator 2 never received a theatrical release in what is now the second-largest film market on the planet, Cameron considers the upcoming 3-D conversion version to be the one the Asian nation deserves. (Because he thinks it’s going to be awesome—not for any xenophobic reason, you weirdo.) “Next year marks the 25th anniversary of Terminator 2 and that seemed like the perfect time to bring it back, but this time in an all-new 3-D version,” said Cameron, probably while piloting an AI submarine made of adamantium through the center of the Earth. “If you’ve never seen it, this’ll be the version you want to see and remember.” Frankly, even without the 3-D conversion, Terminator 2 should be the one you remember, given the movie won four Oscars, and the new ones can’t even get a marketing campaign right.


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