Elton John, humble minstrel of the working man, will somehow transform his life into a big, splashy “biographical musical fantasy” with the help of Billy Elliot writer Lee Hall, confirming a project that John first hinted at back in January, in between being delightfully bitchy about things. Now titled Rocketman, the film will track—in a “non-linear and hyper-visual manner”—John’s story from his beginnings as a child piano prodigy through the “intense experiences” of his career, interspersed with choreographed sequences set to Elton John songs that capture the “the rough spots in John’s journey of self-discovery,” as metaphorically addressed by the lyrics of Bernie Taupin. For instance, John’s infamous bout with bulimia might feature a chorus of CGI toilets singing, “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road,” or a kickline of Princess Di lookalikes might pop up for that one song, “The Bitch Is Back.” It’s also expected that different actors will portray Elton John at the various stages of his career, a la I’m Not There—seemingly excellent news for Ving Rhames, though John has already said he has Robert Downey Jr. in mind, which is a bit presumptuous, don’t you think? Anyway, as of now, Julie Taymor is not attached to this. As of now.