Handcolored lithograph of the nest of the black and yellow mud dauber wasp from Dru Drury's Illustrations of Exotic Entomology, Bohn, London, 1837. (Photo: Florilegius/SSPL/Getty Images)

At-home remedies are becoming more and more popular, and will probably continue to do so, as the state of our national healthcare becomes more uncertain every day. Savvy purveyors of herbs and oils may be able to find cures for everything from stress headaches to diaper rash. Still, sometimes some “natural health” practitioners can go too far, as in the case of this story currently making the rounds today, with wasp-nest paste being touted as a miracle cure for “vaginal rejuvenation.” We know just about zero about science, but in no way does this sound like a good, to say nothing of sane, idea.

The Independent reports today that some women are using ground-up “oak galls—tree deformities caused by wasp nests—as an at-home remedy for vaginal rejuvenation.” Oak galls, which are “formed when a wasp lays eggs in a tree’s leaf buds so that the larva can develop inside,” are being sold by online retailers. They’re usually packaged ground up into a paste “for vaginal tightening and rejuvenation,” according to one such site, titled Female Renewal Solution:

Oak Gall is all you need when you’re thinking about how to make your vagina tighter instantly and overnight, as well as rejuvenate your vaginal walls and muscles… [Y]ou can apply it directly to your genital organs so you will get the most out of Oak Gall benefits instantly.

And ladies, aren’t we always so often thinking about how to make our vaginas tighter instantly and overnight? But not so fast, says Canadian gynecologist Jen Gunter, who came across this treatment while googling bizarre gynecological treatments (previous discovery: vaginal herb balls to “detox the womb”). The oak galls’ result of tightening the vagina may also lead to drying out the vagina, which would of course lead to much more painful intercourse, if not outright infection. Dr. Gunter helpfully offers what she calls a “pro-tip”: “If something burns when you apply it to the vagina it is generally bad for the vagina.”

Dr. Gunter comes across as a shining beacon of reason in the midst of oak-gall madness, somehow maintaining her sense of humor about it all, even if she appears to hate the comma:

So don’t put dried up wasp’s nest in your vagina. I feel pretty confident in offering that up as medical advice and for goodness sake don’t tell Paltrow. She let bees sting her face so she might be all over vaginal vespatherapy.

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