Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Hercules cosplayers
Hercules cosplayers
Photo: Albert L. Ortega (Getty Images)

The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed some rumors that have been swirling around for the past days: Disney is indeed developing a live-action remake of its Hercules movie, and while Joe and Anthony Russo aren’t directing (as some rumors claimed), they are going to produce. THR says that someone with Marvel experience will be involved, though, with Shang-Chi And The Legend Of The Ten Rings writer Dave Callaham working on the script. That’s about all we know, as this project is very early, and with everything still shut down in the movie industry it’s probably way too early to start talking about casting. That being said, THR notes that “enthusiasts” have suggested Idris Elba and Ryan Gosling as potential stars, which is absurd unless they’re playing Hades. Hell, even then it would be an odd departure, since James Woods’ performance in the original—despite his whole… deal these days—is a fun, low-key read on a very over-the-top character.

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Speaking of the 1997 original, Tate Donovan’s performance as the man himself is unimpeachable, and we swear to god we will go after Bob Iger with the fury of the Titans if Disney changes literally anything about its perfect songs. We saw what those monsters did to Aladdin, and we will not let it happen to “I Can Go The Distance.” We swear to god. Also, since we’re here, it would be interesting to see if this remake leans into the original’s parallels to the classic Superman origin story a little bit, since it is a movie about a strong baby who is expelled from the land of his birth, is raised by a pair of farmers who teach him how to be a good person, and then grows up and finds out he’s special even though it’s the fact that he’s a good person that really makes him special. His adoptive parents even present him with a special symbol that represents who he really is. Hades isn’t Lex Luthor and Megara is a little more ruthless than Lois Lane, but trust us, it checks out.

Here’s Ariana Grande singing “I Won’t Say I’m In Love” from Disney’s recent Family Singalong special. Susan Egan’s version is better.

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