Liquor pitchman Sean “Diddy” Combs is returning to his roots as one of hip-hop’s greatest agree-ers, promising to lay down some old-school “uh-huhs” and “yeahs” on a world tour of a restricted area of the world. Combs made his announcement yesterday on Ellen, where the women who’d assembled on a weekday afternoon to watch Ellen DeGeneres be pleasant all agreed that a Diddy tour in the year 2015 is very exciting. They were also excited when he stood to adjust his shiny shirt.
After taking several shots of his Ciroc vodka—necessary to maintain his bloodstream’s balance of premium liquor and shameless self-promotion—Combs announced, “I’m gonna go and do a world tour.” And as he is currently busy with production work, managing his various entrepreneurial efforts, raising his children, and taking year-long bubble baths, this tour will be Diddy’s last ever—and his first since the world tour his group Diddy-Dirty Money undertook back in 2011. Much as that tour’s inclusion of a date in exotic Toronto technically made it a tour of the “world,” Diddy’s final hurrah also comes with a caveat.
“I’m not gonna hit a lot of places, but the places that I am gonna hit, it’s important for me because it’s probably my last time touring,” Diddy said. He did not offer hints as to the locations of these select markets, where the audiences who are eager to see Diddy perform his hits and maybe some songs released in the last decade will be able to do that. Presumably they will be chosen only for their significance to his musical legacy, and their eagerness to celebrate Diddy’s lavish lifestyle. It’s like he sort-of sang on his 1997 hit single: “Been around the world and I-I-I-I, we been playa hated—except in Toronto.”
Diddy also didn’t elaborate on any specific dates for the tour, on whether this tour would be preceded by the new album he was supposed to released last year, or on anything else that was not vodka.