“Pookums!”
Photo: Sony Pictures

We’ve already written extensively about the natural human instinct to get extremely thirsty over Venom—a large, oily tongue monster from space. But while the palpable urge to engage in some wholehearted symbiosis with a tentacled Spider-Man frenemy is only natural, it’s possibly that we’ve been neglecting the more tender and romantic side of the equation. Which is to say, it’s obvious that we all want to fuck Venom. But do we want him to be our boyfriend, as well?

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That’s the searing emotional question raised by the above series of images, brought to our attention by Twitter user Darren Mooney, and taken from the official Sony Pictures account for Chinese social media platform Weibo. (It’s not clear whether the images were commissioned by Sony, or were repromoted fan-art, which isn’t uncommon for the account; either way, a reverse image search didn’t pull up an artist name, unfortunately.) All of the pictures are built around a common theme: Wouldn’t it be nice if Venom, star of the upcoming space monster movie Venom, was your boyfriend?

Like, look at the dude: Turning into a selfie stick, an umbrella, and even just a comforting presence on the train—is there anything he can’t do? (Within the confines of a PG-13 rating, at least.) And while these particular images might not be perfectly representative of what audiences will get when the Tom Hardy version of the character oozes his way into theaters in less than two weeks, it’s a nice reminder that there’s a kind, loving soul lurking behind all those giant, lusty teeth.