Batman And Robin

In what is clearly a thinly veiled threat against the Batman, The Washington Post is reporting that two people in Florida recently discovered a decomposed bat in a Fresh Express salad mix that they purchased at Walmart. To make it worse, they discovered the bat’s remains after eating some of the Organic Marketside Spring Mix, and the animal was too decomposed for the local branch of the Centers For Disease Control And Prevention to determine whether or not it had rabies. Luckily, the two people who ate the salad are reportedly doing fine, but that’s probably a small consolation considering that there was a dead bat in the thing they ate. Fresh Express believes that this was an isolated incident, but it’s working with Walmart to pull all salads from this particular batch off of store shelves as a precautionary measure.

No culprit has come forward yet, because things like this don’t typically have culprits, but it seems safe to assume that this is the work of Poison Ivy and her green thumb of villainy. Also, while Gotham City Police Commissioner James Gordon has not released a formal statement yet, sources within his department suggest that this is part of some elaborate scheme to punish people for the way they treat plants.