It’s an established fact that David Bowie’s had an accomplished music, stage, and movie career. In fact, when he turns 69 this Friday, January 8, he’ll celebrate it by releasing a new album, ★ (a.k.a. Blackstar), which is already receiving rave reviews. Slacking off is not (and has never been) in Bowie’s vocabulary, something hammered home by the website, a searchable, year-by-year chronicle of the Thin White Duke’s life milestones. At age 3, “he had a cameo appearance in a home video”; by age 15, “he formed his first band, the Kon-Rads”; at 23, he “released the legendary album The Man Who Sold The World”; and at 62, “he got a newly discovered spider species in Malaysia named after him, Heteropoda Davidbowie.”

Of course, odds say that not every year will be productive or triumphant—after all, at age 28, the site claims he merely “announced the winner of ‘Best Rhythm & Blues Performance by a Female Artist’ at the Grammy Awards.” (For some reason, having his first U.S. No. 1 with “Fame” and the hit Young Americans LP paled in comparison?) And at 32, “he got hit in the face by Lou Reed after a dinner in Hammersmith. Took it like a champ.” But as a whole, illustrates over and over again that when stacked up next to Bowie’s glories, everyone else’s life achievements pale in comparison.