Just like the rest of us, Conan O’Brien is not immune to the charms of whatever the newest viral junk of the day might be. Lately, Conan seems to have fallen hard for the Tidy Mouse, a Beverly Cleary-ass rodent caught on camera tidying up the workbench of a British retiree in the night. (It is worth noting that The Tidy Mouse “cleans up” by taking loose screws and nuts and placing them into a box full of seed for a bird feeder, so maybe he’s less of a Tidy Mouse and more of a Bird-Murdering Mouse.) Previously, Conan’s infatuation with this mouse led him to find footage of other things the mouse has been helping with around the house. Then, as seen in the clip above, Conan decided he wasn’t content to merely let others reap the rewards of Tidy Mouse. Tidy Mouse, he decided, is now his employee.
Tidy Mouse does all manner of useful things for the Conan crew. He operates cameras, he writes out cue cards, he decorates a birthday cake. Tidy Mouse even makes sure Andy Richter’s coffee has plenty of booze in it. As far as office animals go, he’s surely an upgrade from the Masturbating Bear. Congrats on the new hire, Conan, and maybe keep him away from all those cats you taught how to high-five.